Junk/ Food

IN THIS ECONOMY, I guess I can understand why advertisers might feel the need to resort to the overt sexualization of, well, everything. For example:



Personally, I find that ad a tad ambiguous for my taste. I prefer this:



In case you missed it: unmanageable pubic hair is unsightly.

Some homophobes are, apparently, upset about this Quizno's ad -- but only because the oven is male:



Speaking of phallic sandwiches, the reigning champion of ads-that-make-everyone-regrettably-uncomfortable is still Burger King. Good-bye, homoerotic King of yore.

Wake up with the King 'just watching you sleep.'

IN THIS ECONOMY, we've decided to go a different direction -- with doe-eyed blond blowup dolls who are visibly frightened and awed by the uber-masculine, vegetable-less Super Seven Incher.